What to Say When Someone Is Diagnosed with Cancer: 15 Supportive Words

cancer patients and her partner hugging her on a sofa

There is uncertainty among the cancer patient about how to tell their loved ones about the news. The slow acceptance of the new reality. The dread of being judged and stigmatized with the cancer status.

When someone comes to us, they make us aware of the devastating news. People who are friends or families of cancer patients want to help. Indeed, most people are at a loss for words. Cancer patients” loved ones equally share the burden of uncertainty and worrying about the outcome of losing them.

In this article, I will discuss 15 supportive words that provide genuine comfort and support to someone when they are diagnosed with cancer. 

women looking at the mirror for her past imagine and her current state after chemotherapy

Why is Empathy and Understanding Important to a Person With Cancer?

Empathy, sensitivity, and understanding are important in this situation when people are coming through with devastating diagnoses. The strong need for true connection and comfort is very real to the recipients of our messages.

This situation is not easy for you to deal with. You are commendable for reaching out and seeking out ways to support the person who is diagnosed with cancer. Let’s explore some questions that can bring clarity to the topic: What to say when someone is diagnosed with cancer?

How can we meet them where they are emotionally? What do we say to support their choices without judgment? How can we inspire hope and positivity?

supportive words to support someone with cancer and a mom hugging the daughter

15 Supportive Words for Someone Diagnosed with Cancer 

Empathy, sensitivity, and understanding are important in this situation when people are coming through with devastating diagnoses. The strong need for true connection and comfort is very real to the recipients of our messages.

This situation is not easy for you to deal with. You are commendable for reaching out and seeking out ways to support the person who is diagnosed with cancer. Let’s explore some questions that can bring clarity to the topic: What to say when someone is diagnosed with cancer?

How can we meet them where they are emotionally? What do we say to support their choices without judgment? How can we inspire hope and positivity?

15 Supportive Words for Someone Diagnosed with Cancer 

1. “I am sorry for what you are going through. “

An important point is to acknowledge the difficult situation they are navigating through. Saying a supportive phrase like this could help the person with cancer to know you recognize their struggles.

2. “The world does not want to lose you. “

When someone recently receives the news, their mind can be very harmful. We want to provide assurance. We want to highlight their importance to us and their contributions and potential to the world.

3.”It is not your fault. “

Self-blaming is very possible. Same as regrets and guilt. We want to tell the person who received a cancer diagnosis that their diagnosis is not their fault. They are not responsible for the diagnosis, and they should know that they can put cancer separate away from their self-blame.

4.”You are not alone. “

When they receive a diagnosis, it can feel incredibly alone. They may think that no one understands their struggles and are in this alone. To explain and help them to see that many people have received cancer diagnoses and the fact you are there standing with them. 

5.”You have a community that supports you. “

Community support is incredibly vital for anyone who is diagnosed with cancer. There are communities within their local area or online where support is available.

6.”You are so brave for seeking support. ” 

It’s not easy for anyone to disclose their diagnosis. For them, this is a big step towards self-care and self-love. Commanding them to take significant steps to seek help is incredibly motivating to the person who is diagnosed with cancer.

7.”You are so brave for facing this challenge head-on. “

The reactions of someone who received the diagnosis can range from denial to anger to take action to find the best path forward. Affirming their choices and encouraging them to participate actively in finding a treatment solution can make them more likely to discover ways to treat their cancers positively.

8.”I am here to listen. “

When they are sad or visually anxious, it can be good to lend a sympathetic ear to help them process their fear or sorrow. This way, they offer a chance to be more emotionally balanced after you two converse.

9.”Let me know how I can support you. “

Provide ways you can support the person. You could offer to clean the house, take them to the clinic, help watch their kids or pets, help them cook, or do anything within your comfort zone to give support.

10. “There is hope, and I am hopeful for you. “

You could research current and potential treatment options with them and show them that there’s hope to get cured and their cancer diagnosis has solid treatments.

11. “Let’s take a deep breath together. “

When we are under tremendous stress, our breath becomes short, and we forget to take a deep breath. This is a good opportunity to take deep breaths together to keep us calm in an intense situation.

12. “Let’s take a walk together. “

If they feel stuffed or visually miserable, walk around the neighborhood, get some fresh air, and connect to nature while you talk.

13.”What can I do to brighten your day? “

It’s lovely to hear when someone wants to make you happy. Therefore, you can do the same to make them happy by getting something surprising, positive, or funny that will brighten their day.

14.”What can we do to take care of ourselves? “

When people hear hard news, they might forget to take care of their basic human needs. It would be good to remind the person who is diagnosed with cancer that we still deserve to fulfill our basic human needs, such as enjoying each meal, drinking plenty of water, sleeping enough hours, and going to the bathroom regularly.

15.”I am here to provide continuous support if needed. “

It helps when someone is diagnosed with cancer to know someone will continuously support them. They can always reach out to you when they need support in the future, deepening the relationship and building more security.

Avoid Unhelpful Remarks

When we talk with someone who is diagnosed with cancer, we want to respect their boundaries first and foremost. We don’t want to go into anything if they do not wish to discuss the topic further.

Carefully listen to the persons’ words and see what topics they are interested in exploring further.

The following words are incredibly unhelpful: “You should…” “I think that… “Cheer up!/Smile/Stay Positive” This is too bad.”

Anything that shows extreme happiness or sadness that could impact the person delivering the news would be unhelpful. Anything hints or suggests that changing their current behaviors or emotional state can be intrusive and unwelcoming to the person who tells them about the cancer diagnosis. 

There should be room and space for them to come to you for anything they want to discuss. When you inject your ideas into the conversation without allowing the other person to come to you naturally, this will shut down the communication and make them feel unheard.

Tips for Effective Communication

When someone comes to us to share the news about them diagnosed with cancer, we want to be careful with our approach and the motivations behind our communication. Some practical communication suggestions in this context are offering help but not forcing it, offering to lend a sympathetic ear but not forcing it, giving space and enough pauses after your talk, and staying calm while mimicking the other person’s expressions.

When the person is telling us about their diagnosis, it is vital to listen actively without judgment. Give them enough space to process what you say and pause to think about what they say. If you are comfortable, offer support without forcing them to accept your offerings.

Most importantly, respect their physical and emotional boundaries and emotions when you interact with them. This will help them to gain a sense of autonomy and the space to feel better about themselves.

Final Thoughts

It is hard to take the news of someone diagnosed with cancer and even harder to find the appropriate words to tell your loved ones. Here, we provided 15 words to say when someone has been diagnosed with cancer and the reasons behind why we should say those words.

When we are supportive and able to empathize with their emotions and their suffering, we will uplift the person and give them hope for recovery. 

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Amy Mou

Amy has been a cancer drug innovative vendor manager for the past five years. She is passionate about helping cancer patients, survivors, loved ones, and anyone to understand everything about cancer.

Her background was originally in mathematics and statistics, but she went on to study early childhood education and became a preschool teacher.

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